Chopped Liver – The Great Escape

Doo Doo, Doo Doo Doo Doo Doo, Doo Doo Doo Doo Doo Doo Doo Doo Doo

Da Ra Ra – Ra Ra, Da Ra Ra Ra Ra, Da Ra Ra Ra Ra Ra Ra Ra Ra


Doo Doo
There now follows an account of the great escape of a liver transplant patient from his captors.

Doo Doo Doo Doo Doo,
Today was D-Day – but after last night’s bombshell dropped by @drobeirne that they were unhappy with my latest set of liver results – look I am trying me best here, I cant get it right every time – and so they are going to schedule a TJ Biopsy for today unless the 6am blood test they will arrange shows a marked improvement.

Doo Doo
6 a.m. came – and so did the blood man. sneaking up behind enemey lines, waking me with a whisper and drawing blood from this poor defensive soul.

Doo Doo Doo Doo Doo,
There now followed a period of 3 hours of waiting to see if I had worked hard enough to improve my results. At 9a.m. came the answer – in the form of a couple of porters, a hospital gown and an instruction to get changed – we’re going down.

Doo Doo Doo Doo Doo Doo Doo Doo Doo
I am wheeled down to theatre for the procedure – the TJ procedure – and I am asked “Would you like to be sedated?” Eh, that’ll be a YES then.

Doo Doo
And the deed is done, I feel nothing… but drowsiness. and I am taken back up to the ward to sleep it off.

Doo Doo Doo Doo Doo,
And I sleep till 14:00. B comes to visit – finds me asleep. Finds me looking a far cry from someone devising a masterplan of escape. Visit over. I am left waiting for the result.

Doo Doo Doo Doo Doo Doo Doo Doo Doo
Doctor’s rounds. How’s DK? You tell me Doc. Well, DK, you had a good biopsy – you played a blinder. I hold my hand up. I concede. You are free to go – HOME.

Da Ra Ra – Ra Ra, Da Ra Ra Ra Ra, Da Ra Ra Ra Ra Ra Ra Ra Ra


And that’s where I am – just like the old days – laptop on my knee, footy on the telly, tea and a Tunnocks Caramel Wafer (More than 5,000,000 of these made and sold every week).

And that sure is heaven to me – ooh wap wap! Oooooooohhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!!

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16 Comments on “Chopped Liver – The Great Escape”

  1. Ken Says:


  2. Mark W Says:

    Sounds like you did something right, glad to hear that you have got home,just take it easy and don’t over do it and enjoy!!

  3. Laurel Says:

    Brilliant news!

  4. Mike Says:

    Meet me in Brent Cross tomorrow for lunch?

  5. Sunil Ravji Says:

    Feel for the friend you left behind. The friend that has been here for 34 days now, not that I’m counting.

  6. Phil Says:

    Tunnocks caramel wafers are just the best!!!!!

    Well maybe they come a close second to the fact that you are at home! Great news.

  7. Lee Baker Says:

    That’s great news, I also had an early morining visit and from the amount of blood he took I presumed he was someone from the doner service but actaully turned out to be from pathology. “right lets see, have you produced lots of lovely antibodies?”. I told him I didn’t have time to as I was asleep, apparently my tacrolemus is affecting my production on “M”blood cells as well as reducing “T” cells this is apparently very rare. Oh lucky me.:) If I have I may be home today also

    • davidkallin Says:

      Lee – sending you positive vibes – I hope they let you out today. It all sounds so complicated and no comfort to know it’s rare. Thinking of you. David

      • Lee Baker Says:

        I’ve just been told that I can go home but not until after 8pm, apparently they are waiting on test results from immuology. So I’m thinking what difference could that make, prehaps they might need to give me different drugs? all very confusing, i feel like the donkey looking at the carrot in front of my nose. 🙂

  8. Belinda Says:

    I see the macaroons have been usurped by the tunnocks! Welcome home David!
    B J & K

    • davidkallin Says:

      Well ysee B, as B doesn’t like Tunnocks there’s more chance of me getting one. I’ll have you know your macaroons were strictly rationed when they got to me.

  9. Fiona Says:


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