Posted tagged ‘U2’

Chopped Liver – Why Does It Always Rain On Me?

June 24, 2011

Oh it had to happen, didn’t it?

Every year I go to Glastonbury and it rains.

It makes it so difficult when you are jumping around to the likes of Morrissey or U2, every time you land on the squelchy muddy quagmire you sink in and get barged about and jabbed in the chest by some big greasy lager-filled …..

Ok, ok – hold your horses – stop stressing out Smiler – I am not at Glastonbury.

Just watching it on the telly. Honest.

And thinking to myself – well it kinda looks like a lot of fun – till you think about the logistics. Like eating, drinking, sleeping, weeing and pooing.

And yes it is raining during Morrissey’s set – but the forecast for the weekend is hot and getting hotter – 90 degrees of hot – can you imagine that?

The intense heat. Nowhere to run – Nowhere to hide (rats – waste of a song title) – the need for water, water and more water – and how much will they charge for a bottle of water? And worse, what if they run out? Anyway, I am not allowed to be out either in crowds… or in heat – so, as they say, it is not my problem.

Tell you what – I’m glad I’m watching it on the telly and being able to stare right up Morrissey’s nostrils. And now I’m going to make a cup of tea – and you know what? I may even sneak a little biscuit – and give it a little dunk – while I watch the man making a decent fist of Lou Reed’s Satellite of Love.

To be honest, I have never been a festival kinda guy – always been too needy on the toilet front (should I say, back?). But whenever I speak to people who have come back from Glasto, they all say they have had an amazing time – so good luck to them – but I am staying put watching whatever the Beeb put in front of me.

Oh by the way, on the Warfarin front – after today’s blood test my dose has increased yet again – up to 6mg a day now and continue with the injections – I used to look yellow, then after the transplant I became pink again – now, with my stomach injections, I am turning a darker shade of deep purple (wow, how many music quotes can I fit into one sentence? The answer, my friend, is blowing in the…)


Chopped Liver – New Year’s Day

January 1, 2011

Ah, New Years Day.

The day after.

After the night before.

After a week of celebration, of parties, of music, of dancing, eating, drinking and generally being sociable and planning New Years Eve celebrations.

And then – you can practically see the dust settle – as you slowly rise from your slumber – or drunken stupor – whichever is appropriate.

You wake up late morning. Dose a little longer. Crawl down for your breakfast. And slowly and gradually slip into… well, second gear at most.

Today is a day for not doing much at all – after all, the immediate future starts to loom more seriously – New Year resolutions have to be put into action, and the serious business of… running a business starts tomorrow!

So nothing needs to be done today.

Unless, of course, it is your wife’s birthday!

Not a good day to have a birthday – New Years Day. Not a good day at all.

And here’s why – I’ve explained about the fact that you are in no mood for massive celebrations, but even if you could muster up the energy – nobody else can! Not after last night! The bells chime – and it’s Happy New Year all round… oh and Happy Birthday B.

And usually it’s too cold, wet and windy to go out – it is the middle of winter, remember. And there’s never any mail – nope, even postie won’t work on a day like this.

Still, we can go out for a nice romantic meal later… or, maybe not – all the restaurants are closed.

Alright, I am starting to sound like Victor Meldrew – let’s look on the positive.

None of the above really matters – B, Weedy and me – as long as we have each other – nothing else matters.

And we are all going to need each other this year.

So here’s to B – Happy Birthday. You’re the best.

Oh… and Happy New Year!

Now there… are 3…. steps to… carry a donor card – ooh, wap wap!
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